(Source: ruffclub, via lost-in-my-high)

Timestamp: 1402913278



Timestamp: 1401814990

That awkward moment when you see the light…

 I decided to get in serious shape, become more confident and outspoken, leaving my old life of insecurities and self loathing behind. I’ve since then been told I’m much more attractive and noticeable, and have even been told this by some of the girls who made fun of me back in high school.Now normally this would be considered a victory for most people, but all it did was make me realize something, and that was most people are attracted to superficial things, qualities that reflect themselves, or that which they wish to be found within themselves. While there are exceptions, most human beings are selfish by their basest nature, and feelings are fleeting and situational based on who you met, not some destiny love as shown in some Disney movie. All people go to find another person to satisfy the loneliness that eats away at them on a daily basis, they tell them they love them and cherish them, but when it doesn’t work out, what happens? They move on to someone else, and those previous feelings diminish. They soon tell someone else they love them, and the cycle continues, it holds no true value. As human beings, we HAVE to move on, we are SELFISH by nature, and it’s because of this nature that I do not have a high opinion of relationships. Let’s not forget abusive relationships, casual sex relationships, divorces, so many of us are just violent, impulsive creatures.Now most people will say, “We’re not all like that.” Of COURSE we’re not all like that, and that is the kind of partner I look for in my life. Except there’s another problem, and that’s where it really starts to get complex. As a secondary result of my observations and withholding, I’ve developed an EXTREMELY high moral standard for myself, and other people. I have a strong aversion to selfish-laden activities, the people who perpetuate abusive relationships, casual sex, and objectifying of the other gender. So much so it’s become something of a neurotic compulsion.
The result? I’m an extremely unselfish person, that borders on unhealthy habits, who also has a very narrow and unchanging mindset who thinks the whole world should be the same (NOT so good of a habit too). As a side effect I’ve been popular with women, but only chose to keep it as casual dates and hangouts, all of which I keep at arms length. Both polite and courteous, but assertive and unchanging, unflinching, because of my complexities.